Alton Sisson (Pipelayer – Salem/Portland/Bend/Redmond, OR) ✔️PROSTITUTES ✔️SEX ✔️DRUGS ✔️CHEATING MANWHORE ✔️PORN ADDICT ✔️CHRONIC LIAR ✔️HOMELESS ✔️GAMBLING ADDICT ✔️FELON ✔️F*CKS THROW AWAYS & BAG B*TCHES ✔️Tainted AF ✔️Desperate OLD ONLINE DATING WHORE

You know when you reach that pivotal moment when you know you’re gonna fuck shit up in epic ways….? Well, I’m there.

Shit is about to get seriously nasty… there’s a country song that sings about “her little goodbyes”…let’s see if we can amp that idea times a thousand!

Let me offer some insight to my erupting rage. First off – he spends the better half of the early evening running endless and pointless errands all about him and his needs. Then the asshole starts a fight so he can have an excuse to drop me off at home (it took 5 DAYS of me begging to go home before he finally agreed to drop me off). Then fast forward a few hours and he resurfaces at my house about 11pm fully expecting me to ride back with him to his house. Regrettably I agreed. Turns out he just wanted the birthday gifts I had in the mail at my house. Once back at his house he proceeds to spend the next 3-4 hours fucking off on his phone in the bathroom. And finally about 4am the tweaker starts rhythmically masturbating like the immature prepubescent gross sack of shit that he is. Do you have any idea how infuriating it is listening to some disrespectful lowlife masturbate after he wasted yet one more night of mine with his bullshit? Every minute I suffer through his repetitious masturbating I grow more enraged at his disrespect. He asked me to come back up here!?!? He’s on a whole new level of punk status.

Alton, you silly silly man…don’t you know Lorena Bobbitt is one of my hero’s??? Her major mistake was leaving his tally still intact enough to reattach it. You can bet your ass, well…um, bet your dick may be more likely, that I wouldn’t make such an amateur mistake.

Now….where’s that blender at????

Details coming soon!

Xoxo💋